Day twenty two of the final full IVF cycle in our quest to chase our little miracle… Crinone 8% once daily
Have you ever been so lost that you just find yourself staring into oblivion?
Today is that day, i dont know what to do with myself. I thought i was hungry so i ate, i thought i was bored, so i watched my shows… But when all is said and done, i find myself still staring into oblivion.
Should i watch more tv, should i paint, should i draw, should i cook… im meant to be resting, so no plans for me, but now i just feel lost. It would be nice to draw, but i dont know what to draw. I was going to cook, but then it wont be fresh enough for christmas. I was going to go for a walk, but then im on an excersize ban… what should i do? Maybe i should plan an elaborate dinner… but then who will eat it? Maybe i should cook pineapple jam with the rest of that pinapple… but then who will eat it? If i painted a picture, who would look at it, would it end up in the cupboard like the rest of them? I just dont know where my mind is.
Maybe this staring into oblivion with a blank mind, is a distraction from what really should be on my mind?
Maybe…
Maybe i really am just lost.
“Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves.” Henry David Thoreau
