Eighteen Weeks. Four Days. Day 131 in the quest to meet our little miracle George
What began as a journey to get me through to the end of 2009 has quickly become an epic adventure of heartache and hope. What began as 100 Days of IVF has now doubled… Today is very significant to me because today is day 200, and i would never have imagined that i would be here so quickly, i never imagined i would still be writing each day, and even through all the hope i never expected the journey to really begin on day 100…
I know that each day over the next 100 will will bring me more challenges than i ever expected, more highs and more lows as well. I want to share this with others who share my pain, and i want others to know they are not alone – as i know what it feels like to be in envy, and i know what it feels like to be so lost and confused that you don’t quite know who you are anymore.
When i worte the words above, when i first put my deepest thoughts on paper, i never realised that writing each and every day would or could bring me such joy, i never expected to learn so much, to care so much for others, and to have so many others care so much for me. But here i am, 200 days later, and i have shared every second of my pain, and every heartfelt teardrop, and every glimmer of hope, i have shared it all, and because of that i have learned more about myself, grown so much within myself, and found a new sense of confidence i never expected to find.
200 days ago i was lost and confused, and so i began… Today i look back and i thank the Lord for my journey, for my new understanding and appreciation for life, for all that i have , for all that i will have, for all that i was, and for all that i am today. Today i get to look back and realise that i had to be at that point, so lost, so confused, my world in so much turmoil, i had to go through that to get to where i am now, to become the person i am…
Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not. Remember that what you now have was once among the things you had only hoped for. Epicurus
