Twenty-Two Weeks. Three Days. Day 159 in the quest to meet our little miracle George
Yesterday while i was at the hospital and today as i lay in bed, i thought about the whole process i have been through the past year, and yesterdays titled post really is the only way to describe it… It is scary, just plain old scary, there is no other word for it, no other way to talk about it, nothing else that will describe the way that i am living it. And i know in my heart that i shouldnt have so much fear, that the Lord will look after my little miracle, but i ponder at the thought that the fear will always be there, i know that i may have to look at it as a feeling that i have to live with day in and day out, but i wonder when the excitement will overcome the fear, when joy will take over the dread?
As i waited yesterday i wrote…
Wait for follicles to grow, scared of the outcome…
Wait for egg collection, scared of the outcome…
Wait for fertilization, scared of the outcome…
Wait the two week wait, scared of the outcome…
Wait for the heart beat, scared of the outcome…
Wait for the 12 week scan, scared of the outcome…
Wait for the 20 week scan, scared of the outcome…
Slightest twinge and back pain, scared of the outcome…
Waiting at the doctors, scared of the outcome…
Each time i have nothing to be scared about, each time i have had nothing but good news, i know what needs to happen, i know in my heart what i need to have, but sometimes it is easier said than done…
When you have come to the edge Of all light that you know And are about to drop off into the darkness Of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or You will be taught to fly Patrick Overton
