Day 95 in my miracles life
On the 27th of November 2009 i held onto what little hope i had left inside of me….
To say that i was confused would be an understatement, to say that i was hurting from places so deep would not be enough to describe the pain, and yet somehow we found the strength to go on, somehow a tiny whisper of hope led me to believe i could do this… That i was in fact strong enough to endure the pain and emotional torture that was to surround me for the last 33 days of 2009…
There are times in your life that you remember so clearly, every detail as fresh as the day it happened, every second saved in your memory to play back when you need it, or even when you dont – such a memory exists for me of one year and one day ago today…
As i drove home from the fertility clinic, i cried… I pulled over to the side of the road, and i cried… I screamed in hurt from a place so deep i dont care to remember it, i cried so hard that i didnt think i would ever stop, the tears kept flowing and words spilled out of my mouth… I screamed to God and i ask for a sign, i yelled in pain, i swore, and i cried that i couldnt do this anymore, that if i was to go on that there would be a sign…
That night i bleed. And so the 28th of November 2009 began day one of the last IVF cycle my husband and i would ever have to endure.
That was day one of the quest to meet my miracle.
Day one of hardest and most rewarding IVF cycle in my husband & my lives…
Day one of the rest of my life.
Day one of the beginning of a new family…
You can call it science, you can thank the doctors, you can marvel in what technology can do for us, or you can simply call it a miracle, my miracle…
So many days over this past year the doctors scratched their heads, they shrugged their shoulders, told me it may not be…. So many days i wondered why me, i wondered why it had to be so hard, but now as i stare into the eyes of the little lady i call my miracle, i know that no matter what we went through, no matter the pain we endured… She was worth it.
And now today one year to the date that was day one, i dedicate my miracle, my little lady, my precious Jennifer to God. To a God who heard my prayers and sent me a miracle.
Ready for the Big Day
The Beautiful bracelet From 'Nan & Pop'
Even a practice smile for the camera
The Path of the righteous is like the first gleam if dawn, shining ever so brighter till the full light of day. Proverbs 4:18
